Comical Radio

Luke Wherry called in to explain to us his brainchild, People of Walmart. Peopleofwalmart.com tries to summarize the American lifestyle in picture form so that our obesity can be broadcast worldwide. It also serves to encourage people to look in the mirror.

Chester the Life Coach came in today to back up Danny Lobell and his decisions. And make inappropriate comments. And take a boob-grabbing photo of Intern Allison.

Supercute was our very important underage guest today. Further proof of Danny’s creepiness. Things got superawkward because having tweens and their rabid stageparents in the studio is never a good idea. Especially when said stageparents look practiced in Mixed Martial Arts. Then a crazy old man walked in and made things superduperawkward...oh wait! That was Pat Cooper.

Graham Keay came on today to replace Chris Iacono. If this were permanent, our show would be a lot better-looking and a lot less cranky. Graham expressed his jealousy and desire to follow the Supercute model of existence and move back in with his parents. Recipe for success! Pat Cooper, dismayed by the presence of ukeleles, then told Graham that he may as well quit comedy. A word to the wise - start working when you're 13, or you will amount to nothing! Nothing, I tell you! If you didn’t read that sentence in an old man voice, here it is again:
Start working when you’re 13, or you will amount to nothing! Nothing, I tell you!

Pat Cooper is just full of very useful adages, including, but not limited to:
- "If your mom puts your head in the oven, it means she loves you!"
- "I'll let you know when you're a full-time Jew!"
- "Do nothing for free!"

Then we found out that Comical Radio ruined the daycare program occurring in our building. Pat Cooper's antics and sex talks were loudly broadcast to elementary schoolers for over an hour.

Today Danny Lobell's wet dreams came true. Sean Lennon graced us with his presence in the studio, and even admitted that we have some nice chairs. Granted, we stole very special chairs for this occasion, but what great success!

Dan Naturman stepped in for Chris Iacono today because Chris is out on a very important drugscapade in the midwest. Dan was an appropriate replacement because he and Chris have a lot in common. They both wear brown, they both act Jewish, they are both male as far as the eye can see, and they both didn't get any action until their mid-twenties.

As soon as Chris left, Fabulous Genius Myka deemed it time to return to us. Welcome back!

Kevin Bartini breached a very controversial subject by saying he loves his wife so much that he wants her to cheat on him. Kevin is definitely an ugly son of a bitch, but he has a heart of gold. Intern Allison then tediously explained why girls love gay guys, a longtime source of confusion for straight men everywhere.

A very brief but sincere friendship blossomed today between Lennon and Lobell. Lennon opened up about falling in love with a pencil in the 7th grade, and even beatboxed while Danny gave renditions of Lennon classics.
A few Lennon facts:
- He once wrote a song in French in a dream
- He is upset over the recall of Pluto's planet status
- He recommends taking a long walk in the park
- He loves his mom
- He can levitate

And, as usual, at least three people at Comical Radio were wearing the exact same hat. A very successful day indeed, although we forgot to ask Sean Lennon for $50,000 so Danny could get off food stamps. Hey Sean, is it too late?